If you’re a fan of the hit TV show Seinfeld, you might remember an episode where a chicken restaurant opens right next to Jerry’s apartment and Kramer becomes addicted to their meals.
While there, Jerry spots Newman picking up a “Family Feast” of chicken. The assistant manager hands him a cup of steamed broccoli. Sensing something’s awry, Jerry grabs his arm.
“Broccoli? Newman, you wouldn’t eat broccoli if it was deep fried in chocolate sauce.”
Trying to hide the fact that he’s smuggling some of the food for Kramer, Newman attempts a lie: “I love… broccoli, it’s… good for you.”
“Really? Then maybe you’d like to have a piece.”
“Gladly!” Newman pops a broccoli floret into his mouth and begins chewing, steeling himself against the taste that revolts him so much.
Within seconds, his willpower evaporates, and he spits/coughs the half-eaten vegetable onto the floor, cursing it: “VILE WEED!”
As funny as this scene was, Newman’s reaction wasn’t too different from the average person’s, especially as a youngster.
It seems like we’ve been trained from birth to despise vegetables. They’re relatively flavorless and often poorly cooked. Which is too bad, because veggies can be among the greatest assets for your health. Broccoli alone is rich in vitamin C (more than an orange!) and vitamin K.
But just in case your tastes are still similar to Newman’s, I’ve got good news about saturated fat (the form of fat castigated by the government for decades, even though recent studies have shown there’s no conclusive evidence it’s unhealthy for your heart… and in fact, there was no decent evidence to begin with… which just goes to show how disgustingly incompetent, corrupt, and vindictive the power-hungry, malevolent government is and h-… well, anyway…)
The good news is you can use saturated fat to “spice up” an otherwise dreary pile of vegetables like broccoli. Same with salt. Natural salt is healthy too (which you’d never hear from our corrupt, incompetent government, yada, yada, same deal… )
How can these forbidden ingredients help you wolf down veggies? Whenever you’re hankering for a midday snack, heat up a cup of broccoli. Then smother some grass-fed butter and salt on top… and enjoy.
Unlike Newman, you won’t have to scream out for an emergency shot of “honey mustard!” afterward to wash the taste out.
Have a good weekend. For the next couple days, it’s “serenity now.”
Nate Rifkin
Underground Health Researcher
